¿where in the world is MY_BELLE?

MIA but not forgotten, I miss you My_Belle. I miss your random bursts of laughter when someone says something dumb in chat or even keekeeing at people in PM's.

She makes such an awesome best friend, and always there for me when I need her. She listens to me drone on for hours on the phone when I am bored or in distress. Not only is she my best friend she is like my big sister even though I'm like when she lectures me (lol ILY).

Please donate to the Belle Needs a New Phone Foundation at SheenaTheLatina@gmail.com =)

xoxo,
Sheena the Latina

(WE RUN YOU BITCHES!)

Sheena's Rant: when the fuck can a bitch log in?!

So after my week hiatus, I come back to this bullshit...PK won't load for me. PK won't load for a lot of people. 5 days, 5 hours and 9 minutes later the servers keep timing out on the "Downloading Data" section.

So my inside source tells me that the new update is going to be off the hook. Poisoned weapons, crowns and tiaras and ice feathers and countless other things. The downside is that everything in the PK economy has skyrocketed and trade posts are running low on supplies and the lag has intensified. Not only is lag intense I heard, half of us cannot sign on to play. Times like these make me feel dumb for whipping out my credit card (goes back to my 12 Fuck You's...what the fuck am I paying for?!).

When I finally get to log in, who knows when that is, I hope it's all worth it. Scammers and billionaires are havin a field day I bet.

xoxo,
Sheena

Silent but Deadly--PK's Quiet Vets

Ever notice some of the people in global are either the following: noobs, vets with very little capped weapons or vets/players with no capped weapons at all.

I salute you quiet vet for secretly lurking (or just turning off all chats lol). Not only is your flag count high, you are either rich in gold and/or carry multiple (or ALL) capped weapons.

I didn't believe that shit...until I married one. Reducing my chat time by roughly 25% I found that I lead a more productive day. All chats turned off I can pull off a couple hundred grand in a day. The only downside to this is I get awfully bored and lonely unless my silent vet is by my side.

I can't say that I am satisfied being a statistic in chat where I only carry a limited amount of capped weapons. Are you? What do you honestly play for?

Blind Item: Rise of a Clan

The past couple of weeks there has been an influx of PK clans and "gangs" (and I use that word loosely here). There is a group that has been growing at an alarming rate in which they are given free scrolls as long as they add the group's initials onto their screen name.

No one really knows what they do or what they stand for but inside sources say they supposedly share resources and hunt in a large group. On the contrary they lost a member recently due to conflict. After refusing to share resources, he left and changed his name continuing aquiring his own materials and resources.

Since the rise of this mysterious group, many anti-coalition and other groups have weasled their way onto Global. Many of these groups have scammed and chopped out of revenge against the clan in which so many people have joined.

After politely declining an invite to join, I can only wonder whats in store for all these clans that have formed recently. In my last article I stated that I disapprove of fake gangbanging on the interwebs, so I kind of sit back and giggle at people taking verbal shots at each other over a tag that ends or begins their screen name. Whatever the outcome is I can only hope all these people can find enough scroll merchants to gain their own identity back.



xoxo,
Sheena the Latina

~Sheena's 12 FUCK YOU's of PK~

1.Pk Marriages and Relationships- Out of all the wars waged, backs stabbed, people dropping their shit; I'd say about 90% of that is due to someone's "marriage" or "relationship" fucking up in the game. I hate that this game would not be interesting or have a different dynamic if people didn't like each other. If it's not a scorned lover, it's someone you rejected thats chopping you and all your shit. Fuck that and fuck the emotional assholes who suck the fun out the game because you dont wanna be commited to them. Its not our fault that their spear hunting skills suck ass.

2.Language Filter-FUCK language filter! How can devs not understand that the douchenozzles in the game piss other people off so bad that they need to fucking curse? There are players on there that need a good f-bomb here and there to set them straight. Now we are restricted to an 18+ chatroom that nobody really goes into or where the situation doesnt matter. If you do not like someone's language dont cry to devs about it, block their ass! I fully support bans against harassment however getting banned because you dropped a couple curse words here and there is bullshit!

3.Food-everything requires fucking food! If your avi needed to wipe it's ass it would require food. First of all virtual food costs more than irl food. Fuck that. Devs I understand your need for resources to continue gameplay but my shit still lags and you hire and pay artists to create shit that requires more food! Food also creates super noobs desperate enough pay their way to the top. When you see vets getting their asses kicked by noobs, its a sad day. I'd also like to add that since the introduction of food and the new Age, the PK economy has fucked up so badly.

4.Scamming-I'm tired of listening to people whine day and night over being scammed. If the person is not your friend and its a large trade, dont fucking do it! Use a damn tradepost! Devs created tradeposts for you cry babies so put it to good use. Scammers, stop stealing stupid shit and jacking helpless noobs of their 2 larva meat and 100 gold.

5.Sexual preditors- For the life of me I dont understand why sexual preditors are allowed to run free in PK. Even if a player gets reported, they are served a week ban or talk the devs into letting them out on parole. Fuck you internet perverts. Get real pussy and stop asking young girls about their titties on a cell phone their mommy and daddy pays for. Also, if a girl is not interested stop fucking spamming her inbox with passage requests and blank messages you sick fuck!

6.Favortism-Why the fuck is it that PK hall monitors play favortism?! Example, User A can say one bad word and be reported and banned. User B curses, calls people 'kunts','bytches' and 'homoz' and NOTHING. Fuck you biased PK chat monitors.

7.Battery drainage- The graphics arent top of the line and theres a shiton of LAG so what the fuck? Why is it when I play pk my god damn battery dies 5 minutes later?

8.Noobs & Vets-I dont care how long a person plays, even if you are new or an old player some of you guys act like total idiots or mooches. I understand if someone is new they need help getting up on their feet HOWEVER if you are past a week old then there is no excuse for you to be a total fucktard crybaby in the game. Its common sense, kill monsters and chop trees. And to you so-called vets, there's nothing more lame than a player calling themselves a vet when they've accomplished nothing or haven't been playing as long.

9.Hats-Unless you are super capped you have no business running for hats. Players who go for hats spend a lot of gold ranging from 100-400k or even more depending on how bad you want it. Thats a whole fucking capped weapon or gold that can be used for upgrading or resources. If Morti comes and kicks your ass in a duel then you deserve it! You couldve saved your gold to upgrade your shit rather than yapping on global and getting a hat for popularity points. No kudos for you!

10.IRL Shit-I have mixed feelings about this one. I understand we use this game as an escape from the real world however alot of us reveal too much about ourselves and other people can use that at their disposal. We have Facebook fan pages for PK and we add people on to our Myspace which is asking for trouble. Then you have the assholes who go on global and put you on blast about what you look like, where you work, what kinda car you drive, your family business, etc. ITS NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS and quite frankly its a game no one cares what you do or look like. Unless you are skinny and rich like Victoria Beckham, SHUT THE FUCK UP. We are all floating heads on a screen, some have sunglasses, some don't, some have mohawks, some have giant moles. And to the people who make PK their life, STOP THAT SHIT. You make yourself vulnerable to assholes to clown you.

11.E-Thugs and Internet Gangsters- I do not doubt that there are real thugs who play this game HOWEVER some of you need to sit your asses down! I've seen people talk about going down to someone's spot and blastin' them. WTF?! Its a fucking game, it's not that serious. Also ghetto chicken head bitches, well I dont know if you are one but who cares, you sound ignorant! Just be yourself and you will be accepted. Acting hard on a videogame is dumb especially when you will not really kick that person's ass in real life. Just chop their shit and call it a day. That's what a real G would do

12.Quitting- None of you fucks ever really quit. I'm never going to quit, you're never going to quit, they are never going to quit. And if you did happen to drop your shit, you will come back and pick it up and resume play. I also hate the people who make a big bravado about it on global and dont ever really have the intentions of doing so. If you want to stop playing, confide in a friend and hope they can talk you out of it. This game is too addictive for people to actually quit. To insure you can break your habit, simply break your phone or get banned.

Off the Wall: about the Editor in Chief

  Since the debut of many sites that have branched off of PK and forums, I have decided to open Age of Spilled Tea to the public!
  Off the game I spend my free time crocheting, drawing, writing, shopping and spending time with my amigos (when I'm not feeling lethargic or lazy...SNORLAX!). I absolutely love anything pink and or leopard print. I absolutely love sliding around my pink satin sheets downing glasses of Malibu rum even more.
  My taste in music is probably odd. Obsessed with Lady Gaga and Rihanna I can also be seen rocking out to psychobilly (Os Catalepticos, Horrorpops, Zombie Ghost Train, etc), rap, salsa, oldies, and basically anything I can dance to. Never know what's gonna pop up on my mp3! Kinda like my personality, you never know what you're gonna get ;)
  Not one to bite my tongue for long, I can be quite a loud mouth. I also love to laugh and be silly because I can't stay in a serious mood for too long (this is why I love my babe, he keeps me giggling ♥)
Sometimes half the things I see in game catch me off guard so I'm here to share it with you! Happy reading new AoST 2.0 readers! I'm here to spill tea, inform and have a blast. Thank you if you are with me, fuck you if you're not ♥♥♥

xoxo,
Sheena the Latina